it is inevitable the life will hand you curves. This last 2 months has been nothing but curves to me. so here I sit drinking a beer trying not to wonder but trying to figure out what's going on in my life. The stoggie is being smoked the Beer is being drank. Do I continue and trusting the person that is hurt me beyond all hurt. Do I trust the words that I've been lied to me so many times. I pray, God gives me no answers. I cry out and still nothing. each and every day I hurt deeper and deeper. I love, yet I hurt. anyone that knows me knows that I over analyze every little detail in life. in fact I obsess about it. I try to think about everything is possible in that situation rather than trust what is actually there. Today I have decided to trust. I may be hurt again but it's all worth the hurt if the outcome is to my liking. My life is not been perfect I have not done everything right. I have however done more than been done to me as far as trusting and hoping. will I be hurt again? Absolutely. by the same person I pray I don't. my life has become such a country song. In a dead end job, cant make ends meet. it seems like everything is working against me when I am trying to get things back on track.
I know however, the devil working against me. He wants to see me fail he wants to see me walk away from my life. I have news for him I am a new creation in Christ. I will fight for what I feel is mine. I will give 100 and 50 percent into anything that I want. So as I relax and watch the neighborhood kids get off the bus. I know my life is a lot more perfect than a lot of those out there. I know that I have over analyzed things too much. I know the person that has hurt me needs forgiveness.
Tonight I will forgive that person, I will love that person, I will hold that person and I will cry. not tears of fear or doubt, but tears of a newfound hope that I have through Christ. for Christ is the answer. I ask and pray that He guides and directs me from this day forward. I covet your prayers to pray for me. this hasn't been easy but I will not fail. until next time I will see you on the other side. ~Drew
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